Once upon a time, there was an incredible man who had my own TV show. Kids loved him. Parents loved him. The government loved him. People were even jealous of him because he had the best bike in the whole world and everyone wanted it. He just knew he was on his way -- one day he would be riding his bike through the oval office and sitting behind the desk as commander-in-chief.

Then I went to see a movie and, yada yada yada, no more TV show, no more movies about my life, and no campaigners for Pee Wee 2008.

Well why not? I mean, you can get women to put their mouth on your cigars in the White House, so why shouldn't I be able to run for office? I've grown; I've become more aware of my fellow Americans; I care about the issues; I should have the same rights as a woman to run, certainly!

Well, here's my promise to you:

You tell me where you want me to stand on the issues, and I'm there. Tell me which laws should be passed, and which should be repealed. Forget democrat or republican, I'm Pee Wee, and I'm gonna do exactly what the Americans want. It's called a win-win situation -- you'll voice your opinion and get what you want, and I get to live out my dream. I need your votes in 2008, but before I can know what I "plan to do as President," I'll need you to give me some feedback, and this blog is your chance.

One gang could run this playhouse, because we got the streets, suckas!
Caaaaaaaaaaan youuu dig iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit?!